Tuesday, April 8, 2008

The Tooth Fairy SUCKS!

Those were the words I woke up to this morning, followed by my two oldest laughing. Because you see Kellie's dental visit didn't go so well. Sitting in the waiting room I told her "The Dentist is only going to take a peek today. You may have to have the baby tooth pulled, but not today. You'll go to a special office and they will put you to sleep..." and my tooth to sleep too? "yes, your tooth will be asleep too so it wont hurt a bit. When you wake up everthing will be finished and just fine." Five minutes after Kellie is in the chair, out comes the Dentist..."I'm going to pull that tooth now so she'll be just a few more minutes." ME>>>>>WHAT?!!!! YOU"RE PULLING THE TOOTH? NOW? Hmm, I think he thought I didn't think he was capable, but honest to God fear ripped through me! :o[ My poor baby who is already petrified of the dentist was trapped in that chair with this MANIAC after I told her it wouldn't be today. Anyway, I hear her chatting, I hear her laugh and then I hear her scream and start to cry. At that point I was ready to buy her anything...Pony, Parakeet, Disney...you name it. That was my baby in there having a tooth RIPPED out of her mouth! But, crying stopped, I heard her chatting, and I heard her laugh so forget the Pony, forget the Parakeet, forget Disney she'll have to settle for something from Toys R Us on the way home. So we have the tooth, she tells me she's putting it in her tooth fairy pillow and kisses me goodnight. By the time her head hit the pillow I had forgotten all about the tooth fairy. Enter Jason and Molly, hysterical laughter (because this is a pretty regular occurrence at our house) and the comment "The Tooth Fairy SUCKS!" Gotta love teenagers. So I jump out of bed to be met by Kellie and her big eyes "Mom, does the tooth fairy only come if the tooth falls out on it's own?" AAHHHHH, no. Why don't you go potty and then we'll look to see if the money fell on the floor. Much laughter coming from teens in the hall because in my house the money always mysteriously appears on the floor after toothless child leaves the room. Even my husband was snickering and shaking his head at me. I suck. I really do. I told Kellie that the tooth fairy left her tooth because she was sure Kellie would want to show all the kids in her class the tooth that was pulled yesterday. And, why did the tooth stay in the pillow but the money fell on the floor? Well, ummm, the tooth was farther down inside and when her wings flapped as she flew away it must have blown the money right out of the pocket and onto the floor! Kellie - looking skeptical-"huh". I have told so many crazy lies to my kids to cover up why the tooth fairy didn't take the tooth that I am sure that I will be burning in Hell for all eternity. Who would have thought that it would be the tooth fairy that would bring me to ruin.


miss chris said...

This had me in stitches. Totally happened at my house, too! The tooth fairy is very understanding about how kids want to show off their lost teeth.

Surely a lot of us are in trouble between the tooth fairy, and her cohorts, the Easter Bunny and Santa.

Randi said...

Too funny! Leave it to teenagers to give you support when you need it! ;)

I am glad that my hubs has taken over tooth fairy duties! But my older kids complain the the "new" tooth fairy pays more than the old one!

Leslie Gidden said...

Oh my heavens!! This is absolutely hilarious!!!! Thank you so much for sharing it!!!